Hi. I just got a phone call from a friend. He’s being stalked! I provided that friend with some advice. I am recapping it here for everyone else. Owen Scott Muir, M.D., writes this newsletter. And If this helps friends, patients, and colleagues push back on victimization by stalkers, so much the better.
If you're facing online stalking or death threats, it's crucial to understand how to respond. The severity and frequency of the threats can significantly influence a police report. A single threat may not have the same impact as continuous ones, and explicit threats carry more weight than vague insinuations. I have gotten that “Tarisoff phone call”—where a colleague informs me of a danger to my life. It is not fun. Happy birthday to me!1
Understanding what constitutes a “real threat” is critical. For instance, "I'm going to kill you" is an explicit death threat. What kind of crime is this?
This could be, legally in N.Y., “Menacing”:
N.Y. Penal Law § 120.15: Menacing (in the third degree?).
Menacing is a crime that makes another person fear physical injury or death. In other words, you threaten to do so instead of causing someone physical harm.
There are four menacing offenses in the New York Penal Code. The least serious is menacing in the third degree. According to New York Penal Code § 120.15, a menacing charge in the third degree is applicable if the perpetrator does anything that puts another person in reasonable fear of physical injury or death. It is a class B misdemeanor.
In Virginia, a similar act might be a felony:
§ 18.2-60. Threats of death or bodily injury to a person or member of his family; threats of death or bodily injury to persons on school property; threats of death or bodily injury to health care providers; penalty.
A. 1. Any person who knowingly communicates, in writing, including an electronically transmitted communication producing a visual or electronic message, a threat to kill or do bodily injury to a person regarding that person or any member of his family, and the threat places such person in reasonable apprehension of death or bodily injury to himself or his family member, is guilty of a Class 6 felony.
Federally, if done using the internet, it might be cyberstalking:
18 U.S. Code § 2261A - Stalking
Whoever—
(1)travels in interstate or foreign commerce2 or is present within the special maritime and territorial jurisdiction of the United States, or enters or leaves Indian country, with the intent to kill, injure, harass, intimidate, or place under surveillance with intent to kill, injure, harass, or intimidate another person, and in the course of, or as a result of, such travel or presence engages in conduct that—
(A)places that person in reasonable fear of the death of, or serious bodily injury to—
(i)
that person;
(ii)
an immediate family member (as defined in section 115) of that person;
(iii)
a spouse or intimate partner of that person; or
(iv)
the pet, service animal, emotional support animal, or horse of that person; or
(B)
causes, attempts to cause, or would be reasonably expected to cause substantial emotional distress to a person described in clause (i), (ii), or (iii) of subparagraph (A); or
(2)with the intent to kill, injure, harass, intimidate, or place under surveillance with intent to kill, injure, harass, or intimidate another person, uses the mail, any interactive computer service or electronic communication service or electronic communication system of interstate commerce, or any other facility of interstate or foreign commerce to engage in a course of conduct that—
(A)
places that person in reasonable fear of the death of or serious bodily injury to a person, a pet, a service animal, an emotional support animal, or a horse described in clause (i), (ii), (iii), or (iv) of paragraph (1)(A); or
(B)
causes, attempts to cause, or would be reasonably expected to cause substantial emotional distress to a person described in clause (i), (ii), or (iii) of paragraph (1)(A),
shall be punished as provided in section 2261(b) or section 2261B, as the case may be.
How to Think About the Minds of the People Who Get Those Reports
It is not your job to know whose jurisdiction it falls under. It is your option (or responsibility) to report it. However, mentalizing—imagining the minds of the people taking the report—can be helpful!
Hoping for someone’s demise is distasteful. Threatening to kill someone is worse. Given the escalation toward violence, particularly for mental health professionals, of around 20%, immediate reporting becomes paramount.
“Course of conduct” means twice or more. Thus making the first report so that the second report becomes, legally, a documented course of Conduct.
Threats against your cat? Those count. Don’t f$”$ with cats. They are pets. Horses too. Law enforcement officers are also people. They have jobs. They need to go home and see their kids. They don’t want to get fired. They want to have a sense that they did good work. They probably care about justice and the law more than most. They like a good story and don’t want to be confused.
My advice? Make things easy. “The story is X.Y.Z. P.Q.R. is involved. I think they did it for T.P.Q. Reasons. Here is a document summarizing what happened. It’s got dates, times, emails, etc.” You don’t need to know the law in detail—that is their job. You need to tell an understandable story; frankly, the better organized, the better. Don’t make their lives difficult! Do the organizing work upfront. This can be hard if you’ve been through something traumatic. Ask for help from an organized friend or even speak to a lawyer. There are even stalker expert lawyers like Carrie Goldberg. They have seen it before.
Here is a link to her book “Nobody’s Victim.”
Jurisdiction is an essential factor when these incidents occur online. In the United States, internet communications fall under federal jurisdiction via the Interstate Commerce Act; hence any investigation could involve the F.B.I.—the F.B.I. has a 90% case close rate. They don’t open possibilities willy-nilly. They are BUSY.
The immediacy of a threat plays into law enforcement's response— they prioritize cases that pose an immediate risk to life or limb over future or potential harm. Therefore, urgent reporting is the right plan if there is imminent danger. All the while documenting each incident for future reference. This creates the paper trail for the “course of conduct.”
You can report these incidents through various channels: The F.B.I. has its Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3), where reports are submitted directly. Alternatively, contact local law enforcement by dialing 911 immediately after receiving a specific and imminent threat.
You Don’t Have to Stay Stalked
Not every vague threat or even specific threat will stop the stalking. It does lay the groundwork for it to stop. Thus regular and persistent reporting of such attempts on your rights— to not be stalked—should be practiced so authorities can take appropriate action. If we act like prey, predators will eat us alive.
We all have the right not to live that way. Awful people are enjoying the pain and suffering they cause.
I hope the above proves helpful. Keep a record, protect yourself, and if you need to see a therapist, you should. You can even see a therapist or doctor for one visit and ask: “hey, do people see a therapist for this?” You are allowed to find out—you are not required to go to endless therapy afterward. That is a reasonable use of their skill set. This can be traumatizing stuff.
One of these was literally on my birthday.
The federal law concerning cyberstalking is 18 U.S.C. § 2261A(2). It provides that it’s unlawful for any person to engage in the course of Conduct through electronic communication that makes another individual reasonably fear death or serious bodily harm to themselves or another (including a pet or service animal). The behavior may also be illegal if it causes or could cause “substantial emotional distress.” A course of Conduct means two or more acts suggesting that the individual has or will continue the behavior.