With Regret, I Close My Fake Review Farm

Satire in favor of Lina Khan's Federal Trade Commission

The following article is satirical. Welcome to The Frontier Psychiatrists (TFPs) newsletter. It’s with great regret that I announce that my TFPs-Branded Fake Review Farm is closing. It’s been a good run. I had “a remarkable run,” according to fake reviews. We are so proud of our reviews—without an ounce of truth and with all the sheen. People talk about the importance of Family Farms. Although we're usually thinking about agriculture, there have been a lot of positive reviews that have “been grown” in the fake review farm. Using man-child labor, we've kept our costs down, so it is a version of a family “family farm”…

My fake reviews are super amazing, and TFP has helped me so much. It has been a journey to find the right fake review, but my “doctors” have always been so supportive, and “she” makes me feel like a part of the process. It is a collaborative process, where she asks me for my opinion about the promotion plan and keeps it very person-centered. She is the best!

So, it’s…