The Lord Satan Has A "Great Meeting" With Expensive Consultants.
It's not all damnation and torture.
Every once in a while, I like to take a little break from my endless flogging of things that are upsetting about healthcare and its unfortunate economics and focus on something light…like the Lord of Darkness and his recent meeting with some expensive consultants to help with the hell rebrand. This is in no way crucial or important. It’s only fun. I’m Owen Muir, M.D., and this is a daily newsletter!
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Phil: Hi, I’m Phil. So, I understand that you are the Lord of Darkness here.
Lucifer: I am Lucifer.
Phil: I understand that you were a cofounder in the heaven venture. Is that right?
Lucifer: I was the highest of the angels.
Phil: And, I understand that here, in hell, you reign supreme?
Lucifer: It does say, “Surrender all hope, ye who enter here.” right above the entrance.
Phil: I can see that. That may be construed as creating a hostile work environment, but I must get back to that.
Lucifer: I preside over suffering here in the lake of fire.
Phil: So would you say that suffering is an organizational Northstar?
Lucifer: There are endless sufferings here.
Phil: That sounds like it’s difficult to manualize. I understand you did some consulting work with the Gods of Asgard.
Lucifer: We did. It’s now referred to as Valhalla, Public Benefit Corporation. But, like, we’ve got a lot of problems here. The demons, they are just not giving it their all.
Phil: So you’re telling me there are some problems with the workplace culture?
Lucifer: Yes! It doesn’t seem to be about inflicting suffering anymore.