The Interim CEO of Mordor, Inc. Has Some Frank Feedback for OneRing Search Leadership

The Witch King of the Nazgûl acts like giving 110% isn’t a Core Value anymore?

Update: this poem is directly from the Lord of the Rings, and it’s really all you need to know to get the most out of the following piece when it comes to parody of the source material:

Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne,
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

OneRing: A Platform Solution To Rule Them All

Let’s have the minutes reflect: the motion to have this board meeting come to order is seconded. As the interim CEO here at Mordor Inc., we want to start with a readout to the board on momentum in a pivotal moment in our quest to dominate… the market. Let’s start with traction:

Winners celebrate our wins. I can see that our marquee partnership with the White Wizard, Saruman, has been performin…