Psychiatric Restraint

A narrative medicine story

By the time I passed through the locked door between the hospital proper and the children's comprehensive psychiatric emergency program, there were already upwards of 40 people standing around.  Doctors, nurses, security guards.  I counted later, and it was actually 38.  Your brain remembers these things wrong, reliably.

The security guards looked particularly unsettled.  There were four of them. At Bellevue, the guards are all hospital police.  So they’re dressed like police officers, they stand like police officers, and kids respond to them like they’re police officers.  None of the names you will read are real.  Details have been changed for privacy.

“Nooooooooooo!” The shriek from within room one hurt my ears, and I was 2 locked doors away.  It has a combination of anguish and adolescent tonal instability that is both heartbreaking and ear-rending.  

I moved quickly and gave my key a quick twist to the right, and then another jerk, because the door had a sticky handle.  

I didn’t open…