Dreams of Fruit Logistics
Due to a mixup, I've been invited to a fruit logistics conference.
The Frontier Psychiatrists is a health-themed newsletter. However, every once in a while, there is a mixup. To be clear, fruit is healthy. At least in reasonably sized doses, fruit has soluble fiber and is generally full of vitamins and other nutrients. It's got a lot of sugar; in the case of fruit juice, it can have as much sugar as soda, and it's not generally healthy to drink gallons of sugar. Don't do that. So it is terrible for you. Fruit juice is soda without fizz. It's a health-branded soda. Don't drink sugar water.
That's my advice as a doctor. I know, I'm doing great. I am not a dietitian. I'm not a primary medical doctor, and I'm not a fruit expert. I am working at a practice in New York called Fermata. As I have previously written, there is the possibility of confusion. An Israeli company specializing in artificial intelligence to detect pests that eat crops, including fruit, is also called Fermata. They raised $10 million recently. I wrote about this misunderstanding. And now, predictably, I'm getting many invitations to participate in pest control, agriculture, and fruit industry events.
Apparently, the people who buy the large list of whoever they should invite to their fruit industry conferences got my name on it, and I keep getting bombarded with invitations to join Fruit Logistica 2025.
There's part of me that wants to go. I'm a polymath? Could I successfully role-play my way through a fruit industry event? I've met friends of mine and current actual science colleagues like
at live-action role-play satirical events! This has been high-yield for me in my life. If I had the time, I can imagine myself at Fruit Logistica.I imagine a hall filled with booths where everybody offers to kill gnats, worms, weevils, and vermin. Maybe there's a way to get rid of fungal parasites?
I have to believe there will be fruit as a snack at several of these events. Somebody's probably selling fertilizer. Some of that fertilizer probably makes for a delicious strawberry. Do you think they have strawberries at Fruit Logiatica?
I love a good strawberry.
Even if I have no relevant experience regarding an event about fruit logistics, it can't be more complicated than healthcare! Although we still have to deal with the Food and Drug Administration and the USDA, there's no United Health Group of fruit. There's no Center for Fruit and Vegetable Services dictating the rates I will get paid for suggesting fruit to my patients. I don't have to get credentialed with Sunkist to recommend oranges after having some Chinese food. No fruit benefit manager takes the term clawback literally and ensures they get paid every time I recommend a fruit in a non-preferred tier. Bananas aren't $20,000 per banana, and I don't have to obtain prior authorization for cantaloupe.
Fruit Logistica sounds like an absolute paradise. I need to look into this. I was amazed at what I found….