Someone in a health tech group chat I am in decried the failure of the Hippocratic oath among physicians today. It has some strong sentiment about contraception and contracting, however. I never took this archaic oath—my med school had a modern version. So, I thought TFPs would evaluate how it holds up…for me and this newsletter…
Also, I opened up a bunch of the backlog of posts without a paywall for the time being. Seemed a shame to have them languish. Some new posts will have a paywall, and most will not, but 202 articles were jailbroken yesterday for all of the internet to enjoy.
Quick Reminder: Upcoming May 5th Event: Rapid Acting Mental Health Treatment., NYC. Tickets. Get Them.
“I swear by Apollo the physician, and Aesculapius the surgeon, likewise Hygeia and Panacea, and call all the gods and goddesses to witness, that I will observe and keep this underwritten oath, to the utmost of my power and judgment.”
These seem like solid Gods—especially Panacea. What a great God, that one. The utmost power and judgment, however? That seems like a big ask. The utmost of my power? It might be a lot of power. Depends on the day.
“I will reverence my master who taught me the art.”
Given my fawning articles about Laurence Guttmacher, M.D., and his dad also, I think this is still going well for me. I’ve also shouted out Christoph Correll, and John Kane. I just wrote 9 papers with Burton Tabaac, M.D., and married
. I definitely revere her. Checks out.“Equally with my parents, will I allow him things necessary for his support, and will consider his sons as brothers...”
Given my articles about both my mom and dad, I will again fist-bump myself on this clause of the oath.
“I will teach them my art without reward or agreement; and I will impart all my acquirement, instructions, and whatever I know, to my master’s children, as to my own; and likewise to all my pupils,”
Given my very unpaid time at Mayo Clinic, Distinguished Fellow Of AACAP status, and myriad papers—Academic Publishing a SCAM—I am crushing this oath.
“Who shall bind and tie themselves by a professional oath…”
I mean, I approve of rope-related safety, of which binding is a part—my daughter got on a climbing wall this past weekend at her birthday party!—and oaths? I love a good oath. This is a very strong start for me…however, this is a long phrase…
“I will teach them…”
Right, it’s about who I can teach. I’m doing good teaching.
…but to none else.”
F*ck. This newsletter was a mistake. This is my 571st article. What have I done!? Numerous contracts are going to be called into question. This part is… an issue.
“With regard to healing the sick, I will devise and order for them the best diet,”
Nutritional Ketosis advocacy?… Check. Back on the horse, Muir.
“…according to my judgment and means; and I will take care that they suffer no hurt or damage.”
So…given the dozens of articles on the risks of oral medicines? I am going to need to have a talk with Hippocrates about this one. Gulp.
“Nor shall any man’s entreaty prevail upon me to administer poison to anyone; neither will I counsel any man to do so. Moreover, I will give no sort of medicine to any pregnant woman, with a view to destroy the child…”
Well, on the advocacy for no poison, I’m doing ok. For the strictest anti-abortion stance I’m only safe by virtue of being a psychiatrist…but I’ve done enough writing to be out of compliance with the spirit of this part of the oath at least.
…Further, I will comport myself and use my knowledge in a godly manner…
This is obviously true—and never not true. I am super godly. Like, most days. It is all godly comportment all the time. You know, like, most of the time.
I will not cut for the stone, but will commit that affair entirely to the surgeons.
This is just an easy yes. Surgery—keep Cutting brothers and sisters. I will stay out of your way!
Whatsoever house I may enter, my visit shall be for the convenience and advantage of the patient;
Yes. House calls. I done ‘em. What is up, PACT teams?!
“and I will willingly refrain from doing any injury or wrong from falsehood, and (in an especial manner) from acts of an amorous nature, whatever may be the rank of those who it may be my duty to cure, whether mistress or servant, bond or free.”
So much yes. This is a real issue: Don't have sex with patients. It’s an important ethical prohibition in psychiatry, and, apparently—according to the ancient Greeks—across the board.
“Whatever, in the course of my practice, I may see or hear (even when not invited), whatever I may happen to obtain knowledge of, if it be not proper to repeat it, I will keep sacred and secret within my own breast.”
Was Hippocrates a psychiatrist? Love the focus on privacy! Don’t tell him about the HIPAA backdoor for law enforcement or billing, though.
If I faithfully observe this oath, may I thrive and prosper in my fortune and profession, and live in the estimation of posterity; or on breach thereof, may the reverse be my fate!”
Honestly? This went better than I thought. Outside of consulting work, this newsletter, which In retrospect is a real problem for Hippocrates.